DISCLAIMER - reading this is a contract. This contract states that you are not able to ridicule the writer for any comments made here. This is an experiment/project - if you don’t want to participate, I completely understand. Just know that writing most of this down hasn’t been an easy start. Please - read on - or not that is your decision. Thanks.
Not sure what will come of this - maybe it can motivate me, maybe it can motivate others, maybe it will be a big waste of time. Either way it turns out, I won’t feel like it has wasted any of my time. The last few months/years have been growing years for me - in many ways…growing as a person as well as (re) growing in size. The size part has been a constant in my life - while I still am essentially within 1 pant size of what I wore when I graduated high school, my weight has fluctuated up/down 50 pounds or more. It seems that I can get things going but then slowly it starts to fall away and then more rapidly. I’ve wondered many times why I can’t keep it straight. I can keep my mind to just about anything else in life - but not this one thing. I think now that the reason I can’t keep up with a health routine is simply that I have always done it for the wrong reason. The first time I went on a health kick, it was to impress someone. (on a side note, it did work but sadly that was not meant to be) Once I accomplished the goal though, things started to slide backwards and when it was realized that it wasn’t meant to be then the slide increased. The second health kick was started out of sheer determination to prove somebody wrong. I was told during the end of a relationship that part of it was my health and that was part of things, especially after spending time with my parents. While that hurt to hear, since then I have come to appreciate that conversation. While that should have been my wake up call to permanent change, it wasn’t. I was just bound and determined to show that person that I could be healthier - and I was. Again, once that was proven, the determination left and the focus left. I’ve made every excuse in the book….but all just excuses. I’ve been spending more time with my parents and really the wake up call I should have had years ago has started to click in my head. I’ve never let weight come in between me and accomplishing anything and I don’t plan to change that. It is a slippery slope though - and once you start to slip, a fall could happen anytime. Reality hits when you see others you love not be able to do simple things in life because they didn’t realize they were on the slope and just fell down. Its time for me to stop the cycle and take action. I refuse to be someone that relies on others to do life’s simple tasks…I can’t be…I won’t be.
So what is my point here?
As G.I.Joe taught me - knowing is half the battle. Yes, I know its time to make a change - but I’m lacking the proper motivation to start. At the same time, I know that if I start within 3 weeks I won’t need motivation because I will be into it. Start of this process is this “note” I’m writing here…putting it down on “paper” is getting it all out. If I actually post this somewhere then that is the next step because then others will see it and (possibly) read it too. I’ve already taken strides to change my diet to a healthier diet, reduce beer/alcohol intake and have started to see results just from this. The next step is to get into a workout routine - and that is where I’ve struggled and continue to struggle.
Ok….you’ve read this far - really what is the point?
Lets call this “The Great Landis Improvement Project” and I’m asking for your help. Today is Sunday, June 12 and I’m calling this “Day Zero” - hopefully by “Day 21” I won’t need help any longer. I don’t know if I can keep up with posting something daily…but I know I’m going to write something daily. I’m not starting today with a goal of losing X amount of pounds. I’m not starting today with a goal of making X like me. I’m not starting today to prove somebody wrong. I’m starting today to be healthier, to lose weight,, to be inspired by others that have done the same things and hopefully to inspire others too. Simply put, I want to be comfortable in my own skin again.
So, my friends…if you are willing to help then share motivation. If you know of something that works, please let me know. If you just want to be the person that wakes my ass up in the morning and forces me to work out - I’m all for it. If you see that I haven’t posted a workout on Facebook for the day - ask me why. You don’t have to do this everyday, or at all for that matter…but if you would you too can be a part of this great project/experiment. Part of my growing process is knowing when you can’t do something alone…and asking for help. Again, I don’t know where this will go in the end - but I’m determined to see it through to find out.
Love and other such pleasantries,
Landis
(Reminder of the first paragraph disclaimer - if you read this you have committed to not make fun of me for whatever I’ve written)
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