Sunday, June 19, 2011

Day 5/6/7

This weekend was stressful in many ways.  The details of the events are not important to this message - only the ways we deal with stressful events.  Where do we begin?  Friday seems like ages ago…how time flies when you aren’t having any fun.

Friday/Day 5

Finally!  I pushed myself to get up extra early and use the elliptical!  I had a feeling of satisfaction throughout the day!  An early morning workout is a sure way to set up for a good day - I made better decisions on what to eat/do from the morning workout.  Friday was also the first time that I went out to dinner since making a decision to be healthy…and what better challenge then to go to a bar/restaurant that specializes in fried goodness.  I was able to hold back and have a salad….score.  Then, to a baseball game…and no snacks.  (all of course meant I saved room for a few beers - some to celebrate a good time with an old friend and some to signal the anticipation of the rest of the weekend)

Saturday/Day 6

This day was planned to be a very busy day, but one where I was going to call some friends in town and meet them to at least be active outdoors.  Sadly, this was not meant to be.  I did take every opportunity I had to walk when I could and do something other then sit and wait.  The events did make it a very light food day with only a breakfast bar until thankfully my sister (and family) fed me dinner.  I was hungry still but didn’t eat too much and drank only water.  Baby steps - every little thing counts.  I was also up very late getting a lot of things done that were needed and was able to force off the late night munchies.  Mind over matter?

Sunday/Day 7

By far the hardest day of this whole adventure.  Exhausted isn’t even the word to describe where I was.  There was nothing more I wanted to do then grab a soda or more caffeine but I held strong.  Tired is typically another weakness…because I feed myself all day to keep some energy going.  I did try some “Wheaties Energy Bites” and let me tell you - the last word describes best my feeling on them.  By the time dinner rolled around (again thankfully fed by my sister) I had eaten a banana all day.  I probably had a little more macaroni and cheese then I should have but I still did my best.  Yes…I did have a piece of birthday cake to - had to celebrate for my niece!  (turns 4 tomorrow)  My last weakness exposed for the day is in driving medium/long distances.  I have always bought some kind of caffeine and snack before a drive like that…mostly because I’m bored and it was something to do.  I had to stop for gas this evening and decided it was best to not even go in the store….I only had an hour to drive I decided.  As I said, this day had disaster written on it and other then a little extra macaroni and a few Iron City beers (yes, Iron City) I feel that it was still successful.

This weekend was really a slap in the face reminder of why last Sunday I wrote my Day 0 entry and started down this road.  At some point, it is too late to stop and turn things around to make them better and slowly you go down a road with no return.  What is hardest about that path is that you don’t even realize what you really can’t do until the first time you fail at it.  That failure can stick and your mind and paralyze you with fear and uncertainty.  This is the point that somebody realizes that the return path may never go full circle because of the abuse you have put your body through getting where you are.  What if all it took was 50 extra steps each day over the course of 60+ years to be healthy - is that too much to do?  It occurs to me that working out is great and keeping on that path is something I will keep doing.  More of this journey lies in the few tiny activities we all too often skip because we are tired, or our knee/foot,/arm hurts too much, or because it might be too hard to do and forcing ourselves to do them and keep doing them day after day.  Doing that exact thing daily will be when I know I’ve arrived at the final goal…at which I won’t need a reward because I will have made the change my path and change my mindset.

LANDIS

(editors/writers note - if this is more ramble then normal I am on about 7 hours of sleep since Friday morning and have had one of the most stressful weekends of my life.  Thank you for understanding and reading)

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